True Stories of the Sick and Nasty

Sick: I have bronchitis, after going to the doctor that was the final call. Took some meds and already feeling better!! The cough syrup makes me sleepy so I can only take it at night. The pills are the size of your pinky and I cannot take with my usual antacid medication, so I have to take it at night.

Nasty: Here's the deal on yesterday, the wife laughed when it happened and so did the co-workers when I told them, in hind sight it was funny but at the time I was not laughing....
I got in my car to go workout and started to leave the garage, I started coughing so much that I spit up in my mouth, I tried to open the car door and spit it out but since the car was moving the doors automatically lock. I started to panic and gag at the same time, I could not get the door open and I puked a little in my mouth, that started the chain reaction of the vomit, since I could not get the door open and I felt the next wave coming I just tilted my head back and puked, I looked like a volcano...I finally get the door open and step out to puke again, unfortunately I am still backing out of my garage and my driveway is a slope, as soon as a step out I start getting pulled out of the car. My leg gets dragged between the door and car frame and my foot gets rubbed by the front tire, as I am falling out I am able to hit the shifter and put the car in park. I get out, spit and walk inside. I end up with puke all over my shirt, sweatshirt, car and driveway, I have a big old bruise on my hip where I hit the ground and my sneakers have a mark on them wear my car tried to run me over...the most disgusting thing that ever happened to me...

True Story: When I was in the 7th grade I walked out of my house in Queens to go to school, I wasn't feeling well that morning and when I got to the bottom of my stoop I puked. I ran back in the house and told my mother. She said all those motherly things and then handed my a pitcher of hot water to wash the puke off the front stoop. When I did that she handed me my bookbag and said have a good day at school, I told her I was sick and just threw up, she said now you are not sick anymore and sent me on my way....